That’s right, I am not a teacher. The amount of patience required for that doesn’t run through my veins. Wrangling the attention of a couple of hyperactive boys in a non-school setting isn’t part of my skill set. Homeschool has never been more than a fleeting thought because it takes a special kind of talent to be a teacher. Bless their hearts.
Continue readingKids
Apocalyptic Pandemic and Pint-sized People

With the coronavirus creeping up onto our shores, I started to think about how our family would deal with such a crisis should it spread as quickly as it has in other countries. What are some things that I could do to protect my little children and how can I get them to participate in prevention strategies without causing a full-blown panic in my already tumultuous household?
Continue readingMargaritas, Mexico, and Mentally Absent
Purposely Being A Non-Existent Mom

I didn’t go to Mexico. I didn’t drink any margaritas. Both would’ve been nice but it never actually happened, at least not since I’ve had children.
Continue readingOde to My Husband
Are there any wives out there that don’t pick on their husbands now and then? I don’t make it a habit to constantly be a nit-pick with mine nor do I ever run him down but after being married for 13 years, I’m entitled to the occasional wifey-nag and a little teasing every once in a while.
Read moreSchool Supplies Can Suck It

Yep. That’s generally how I feel about the extremely long list of school supplies I have to buy each summer for each kid.
I have kids in both private and public school this year and neither one is better than the other when it comes to draining my already limited cash flow. I have to ask myself, shouldn’t my expensive tuition cover the supplies my kids need or shouldn’t my super high property taxes and state taxes fund this stuff?
ReAD MOREOMG, Please Don’t Let My Kids Be Naughty In Church
A Prayer That Has Yet To Be Answered

I get it. My kids’ unrelenting naughtiness is my cross to bare. For those of us who are open to allowing the Lord into our hearts, we understand that suffering moves us closer to Him. Attempting to bring one, two, or three of my children to Sunday mass can sometimes be so tortuous that I think it could put me on the path to sainthood. Alas, I am no saint and try as I might, I will never be one.
Continue readingVSCO Girls and Other Middle School Nonsense I Just Don’t Get
And the Importance Of Trying to Understand It All

Middle school. Saying those two words out loud leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Maybe it’s because I distinctly remember the smells that pubescent children would leave behind in the hallways. Whether it was from a lack of hygiene or a lack of fart etiquette, frequently having to walk through those invisible pockets of stench in between classes was not a pleasant thing.
Continue readingFloating Away From It All

I’m drifting further away. Away from my family, my job, my messy house, motherhood, bills, stress, and responsibility. My soul is in a dreamlike state. My vision is partially blurred by the light and I can barely see my loved ones anymore. I hear soft, gentle sounds calling me into another world. I can feel my anxiety melting away as I stretch out my arms, reaching into the sky and allowing myself to float into the peace that awaits me here.
That is, until I catch a glimpse of a boat headed straight towards me and my floatie.
Continue readingIt’s 75 Degrees and Sunny So Why the *Bleep* Won’t My Kids Play Outside?!
Plus 30 Outdoor Activities That Require Little To No Parental Preparation

It’s only been two weeks into summer break and I am seriously wishing I could send my kids back to school. Like right now. Apparently, I’m supposed to entertain my children during the summer months. My daughter was actually incensed at the idea that my husband and I wanted to do something for ourselves on her first day of summer vacation. Forgive us for being so selfish…
Read MoreEscaping the Asylum
A Rare Date With My Husband and How You Can Make Kickin’ Your Kids to the Curb Every So Often a Priority in Your Marriage

I once told my husband that the only way we’d ever be able to go on a date is if we got divorced and each of us went out with someone else. I’d be his built in babysitter when I’d have the kids and he’d be mine on the weekends. Maybe that’s why so many people have affairs, because having someone at home holding down the fort makes it a lot easier for the other person to escape into a new, secret kind of world.
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